216: I Heart RBX

Last Years Paris-Roubaix

I walked down the street today. My legs felt like someone hit them with a baseball bat. Not a really smashing blow or anything like that, just one good solid whack to each quad. Maybe with the added bonus of a punch to the middle of the calf - for good measure. However frightful this might sound though, it is not.

It happens mostly when you start out walking. Each and every curb that you step up, or down, feels like one of those awkward super high, or super low curbs. The ones that you feel like you should sort of jump off of, but feel ridiculous doing. Except that they are not those curbs. They are just regular curbs. Maybe it has something to do with the motion of riding? As soon as you swing your leg off the bike that fluid motion that has been a part of your body for the past few hours now becomes a series of broken and jerky movements.

The one thing that it does well is that it slows you down. Or in this case it slows me down. Yeah, yeah, stop and smell the flowers or something to that effect. However I always see or hear something that I never expect. For example, on the way down the street today: I heard the window slide open before I heard the women speak, before I saw her leaning out the window. She was very large and very black, but the words that came out of her mouth left me chuckling to myself for another two blocks. "Romeo! Rooo - Meee - Ohhhh! God damn it, where is shit is that boy when I need him." Eat it Shakespeare.

King Kong.

We rode the King Kong RBX this weekend. That is to say the Paris-Roubaix version of the King Kong Classic. This ride could, or might have been appropriated from its original intent. I would like to think not, but the possibility always exists. Hopefully we can keep it up as a sort of monthly ride (I really just like it as an excuse to try and design another funny flier). Although the very nature of the ride makes it worth getting together.

See the photo below? Does that not look like Roubaix? Ok, so maybe it does not, but the ditch looks a little like it... see the comparison? Well, Chris Milliman sent over some photos for me again. Love that guy. I have seen him in action a few times (Rapha, Ibex, Serrotta, Various and Sundry Cycling Events) but this one, where all he did was shoot photos of handsome looking Italian men. Well, that was pretty awesome to see...

Ditch - King Kong Classic 2010 Edition

Ditch - Paris-Roubaix, 2009 Edition

About to be Ditched - Paris-Roubaix, 2010 Edition

Photo by Chris Milliman

I rode this morning before I got to see the actual coverage from the race. Apparently the Verzus does not want you to watch their coverage either. Wow, never is it more apparent that they are not cyclists, or care about cycling, than when they cut to ads in the middle of THE decisive move of the day (week? year?), and then come back to the race after it has already happened. Yeah, I get it (you told me on twitter) you did cover the move. But eff that, I want to see what happened right up until the moment that the move was made.

No big deal, we can find it on the internet. Besides, the race happened hours ago, so don't you guys think that you could go back and make sure that we get to see the important moves? I just do not like to see people worry about these things. I want all the angles covered, so to speak.

Worry Not Weaver, You Do Indeed have the best Kit - King Kong Classic, 2010 Edition

Don't worry Dusty Chimp, you'll get it next year- Paris-Roubaix, 2009 Edition

You Just Finished and that is Fucking Amazing - Paris-Roubaix, 2010 Edition
(but the cobbles look to have jostled the Bell logo on your helmet)

Photo by Chris Milliman

The one thing that I was bummed to have missed (its Tax time what would you have me do?) is to have played Cyclocosm's game Paris-Roubino. Both BKW and B.Strickland sent over quotes for me to put together into a document. Maybe I will get to that in the next day or so (Better late than never??) but there were some really great ones on Cyclocosm as well. Wonder who won? Probably not Hincapie.

I am purposefully glossing over a few things that happened around the world this past weekend and I'm hoping for more answers as we move into the next few days. One of my favorite cyclists and member of the Embrocation Road Race team Colin Holmes Murphy went down hard at the Battenkill (a few broken ribs and a partially collapsed lung? fucking OW!)...think good thoughts think good thoughts...we are here for you my man.

215: On Battenkill, PR and other such things.

It amazes me how much people geek out about the Classics, the Monuments, these early season races that somehow do not compare to anything else all year. It is No Joke. I do it too.

It is like the Super Bowl every weekend. No big deal. But speaking of the super bowl, good luck to everyone at Battenkill. Seriously. Harness your power animal, or whatever it takes and just effing go for it (power animal suggestions - Pink Hawk, Dolphin, Cougar, Honey Badger, Mountain Goat, Bunny Rabbit, and Marshmallow Peep).

There is also another big one this weekend in terms of the UCI world of cycling*. Who is it going to be? Can Cancellara do it again? You want to say probably not, if we are just basing things on odds. But there is more magic and mystery to these things than even I understand. What happens if these two babyfaced teens have to battle it out once again?

1. Pippo 2. Cancellara 3. Boonen (just a guess).


Found that via a pretty concise little write up about our man Cancel via Pez. It is worth a perusal if only for the photos of the man in Mapei kit (but the write up is a great overview of his already amazing career). Although I would venture that pretty much anyone in Mapei kit is bad ass. I guess that is the way to combat a particularly hideous cycling kit. Make sure that everyone riding in it be unmistakably BAD ASS that way your strange looking kit supported by an adhesive company get the recognition they deserve and thereby making your obnoxious clothing associated with "the cool." Either way, it works.


But this was today.

Chris Milliman Photography

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Riding
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There is some fun riding planned for this weekend as well. Kings Valley tomorrow and then another one of these King Kong Classic thingamajobies. Hopefully the weather either holds or is really shit. Could be either. Could be fun either way.

Also got a sweet snapshot of Joe out riding his fully built, fully awesome Ridley Helium at PIR earlier this week. Thought you might like this one. I am hoping that there will be some photos coming in from Battenkill because last I heard this morning there are something like 8 Embrocation riders in the CAT2 Field. Shite.

Also, check out the finishing tape that we have been working on. Now everyone can "finish off" their handlebars with a little bit of "embrocation" if you know what I mean. Wait, what?



Secret Tip #23: Follow Bill Strickland on Twitter for some up to date Roubaix coverage. I know that last year he talked about doing a live twitter feed through the entirety of the race. And if I know him he is going to have the best seat in the house (in a Press Car with the best driver in the World James Startt) That is all...

084: Getting There.

I found this image as I'm readying files and sending them off for Embrocation Volume4. I didn't take this photo but I've thought at lot about it at this point.

Always forward.

069: Katousha Would Break You Too.

Rode P.I.R. tonight.

It is something that you do in Portland. Ride bikes. Race bikes. Talk about bikes. Think about Manifests for Bikes....bikes bikes bikes...and its all positive, all the time. Right? In any case the race was a nice Tuesday night attack fest. Dave Roth himself was there. He described it well to me by stating "Welcome to our little Tuesday night World Championships."

Doesn't every town have a TNWC?

On the way home I was talking to S. Hunter. Which is also sometimes pronounced Shunter. Ad in "The Shunted One." He's an all around great guy and his exploits riding with the Pro's of Euro Cyclocross can be seen here. I'm sure that he hates this. Yet, if I was pushed out of the way or punched by R. Groenendael, I would tell everyone I know.


So, through the conversation with Steven I remembered this ride with the Katousha boys. Maybe it is because I'm getting ready to embark on Rapha Continental Round Two? Or maybe it just had something to do with riding in a group again. Either way, it was a pretty fantastic opportunity to ride with some pro's and see how they do things.

We all met up with Katousha early in the morning two days before they would ride the Paris-Roubaix. A nice little recon mission with a bunch of euro-wannabe americanzies tagging along. Sounds like a great plan right?


I could tell from the onset that they weren't too thrilled. But they put up with us anyway. Or put up with us the best way that they know how. By dropping the lot of us as fast as they could. It wasn't even a matter of choice. Embrocation Cycling Rider Peter Bradshaw was the only one who could hang with these boys (he can be spotted in this article by Rouler's Guy Andrews.) A flat tire didn't help me any, but I'm not complaining. I had a great day riding by myself.


Pre ride prep happened on the side of the road before Arenburg. Tire pressure was checked. Pictures of fake Vredstein's were taken (you're not fooling anyone there guys.) Someone from our group threw up in the bushes...maybe it was nerves?

And then we were off.

This little video shows it all. Or at least the all that I saw.

Sweet Ridley Bikes with Cross brakes? Check.
English Editor of esteemed Cycling Publication? Check.
Backsides of Professional Cyclists? Check.
High White Socks Complimented by Mavic Yellow Shoes? Check.
Inadvertent Rapha Clothing Ad? Double Check.

Also, with a little digging I found that Katousha, or Katyusha, or Катюша if you prefer...

Well it is actually the name of a WWII Rocket Launcher? Does anyone else find this odd? I mean, its cool and all and I get the obvious reference of Cycling to War...but could you imagine the German Luger Cycling Club? or the maybe the Lee Enfield Riders? Just a thought.

Gross Domestic Product eh? I'm on to you Ka-whoever you are.

064: Belgium (and France) — end of the road...

"No Comment." Again.

Standing on the edge of the Velodrome...

It was a rare moment. I haven't been at a spot near such an excruciating race finale. For most of the riders their emotions preceded them. One step off the track and the rider Silence-Lotto's Johan Vansummeren started balling his eyes out and blubbering to his girlfriend in his native tongue (of German?) Seemingly unaware that we stood nearby offering our private console.



The Two Cofidis riders that came through (Florent Brard and Sebastian Minard) had to be my favorite. Sublime and a part of everything that was happening around him. Possibly the gravity of what had just been accomplished still sinking in to ones gut. Not to mention Minard's interesting tape job on the arms. Apparently this was simply to keep the jiggling and shaking of the muscles down. Some riders had taped their wrists and even their fingers as well.


Roger Hammond didn't even get off his bike until he did this sweet cyclocross manuever into the shower building. Way to go Rog'. Is everyone with me in thinking that this guy is an amazing hardman?

The comparision for myself comes from this past weekend and the Battenkill course there. I stood at the finish line wholely pleased with myself. Despite the conditions and mechanicals I was pleased with myself. However, my preference at this point was to wander off alone and smile at what had just been done.

These riders are faced with the lot of us standing and pointing cameras into their faces.

Which is better?

063: Belgium (and France) — Part Two: Paris Roubaix

The Final Installation.

I had to scramble for this spot as Tornado Tom headed into the Roubaix Velodrome. My press pass had run out in the sense that I wasn't going to be allowed on the infield without a photo-bib which I didn't have. I tried slipping past the security guards and into the infield but was met by about 30 other guards who decided that my lack of bib meant I had done just that and was turned around as I reached the grass.

I ran past others who were trying to do the same and did a little technical climbing to get on top of a pillar next to the road. For some reason there was only one other guy with me on my perch. And for a moment I stood pondering why no one else would want this vantage point.

The answer came to me as I was looking down on the people at my feet. They didn't care one bit about a birds eye view of Tom Boonen coming in to hit the final straits of the track. They wanted to be as close as humanly possible to this man. And that didn't mean standing up and far away from him. That meant pressing all their humanly goods against the fences in anticipation of his arrival.

Who knows what will be of Boonen in the years to come? Only good I can hope. All I know is for these few tense moments before his approach, he was a God among men.

There was a whisper of excitement as he approached. The thunderous applause that was building around the corner and down the block was now approaching the Velodrome. And then the place erupted.

In more ways than one.

I stood near the entrance to the showers (again, Bib needed) so I got to see the majority of the riders as they exited the track and headed for the soap.

NOTE: The screen actually gets smaller because the small battery on my camera had died and the backup one too...dead. I resorted to using the video function on my little Panasonic Point and Shoot.

NOTE2: When the camera turns to follow Florent Brard into the building, pay attention to the photographer that stands up, the one doing the jesus impersonation. That's fabled photographer Camille J McMillan shooting photos for Rouleur. Can't wait to see what he got.

It is hard to imagine that two days prior I had ridden on this very same velodrome that was now packed with people. This is the finish line. Seems fitting I guess.

060: Belgium (and France) — Part Two: Paris Roubaix

This is the third spot that we set up our cameras. Sorry for the jerking around at the beginning of the clip. See the dirt rut at the side of the road? I don't know why I did not think that the riders would be utilizing that path. Only two days earlier, I was utilizing that path. Now, I was trying to stay out of the way of the riders.


I like the sound that the cars make over the cobbles. It doesn't come through entirely on the video, but they rumbled the hell out of that place. Well, I guess they didn't rumble the hell out of it, because it still looks like hell to me. I like this photo below because the Rabobank rider looks so off kilter and about to tumble over. He didn't.

Nothing to exciting happened over this section. Nothing exciting besides a bunch of badass PROfessional cyclists ripping over cobbles that is. However, the huge 15 person motorcycle crash was right at the end of this section of cobbles. It was a pretty gruesome scene, blood everywhere and people running around like madmen. The scariest part about it, and I have no idea how they got it all cleared out of the way in time, was that the rest of the field was bearing down on us as we slowed for the crash. I looked out the back window at one point and could see the roiling crowd of dust that was the peleton rounding the curve behind us.

Also included a little snippet of whats to come as far as actually driving on the cobbles. From here on out the crowd 'participation' stared to get a little hairy. As you can see in the video, they were lined up and ready to go...