126: All things Cross.

Sorry to say that I will be missing out on the festivities. Went to their event at Wheelworks last year and it was pretty crazy. People were buying raffle tickets as long as their arms. Longer even and coming away with some pretty sick prizes. Mo is one of the greats in New England Cycling (and she has a pretty kick ass mechanic too) so get out there and support their endeavor MM Racing. And Congrats to her on her win last weekend in VT. And one more point of interest: She is currently tied with Katie Compton for the most USAC Points. Niiice.


Mr. Joe Staples and I went out to P.I.R. to do some teaching on Monday night. We ended up teaching people how to dismount properly (have no fear, I will teach them the East Coast Step Through next time), how to keep your elbow in as you cross barriers, and we taught shouldering techniques as well. But before that happened we gave what one might call an Embrocation Session. This is where we explain what Embrocation is and how to fully utilize its magical capabilities.

Luckily for you Mike Davis from PDX Cross was there to capture the whole experience.

It got me to thinking though. I have already seen some great cross racing this year. In Vegas. Did I mention that I went to Vegas?

Cross Vegas is one of those rare bike races. Equal parts industry party, Mad Max desert romp, and lung busting Cyclocross racing (apparently something in the astroturf does the lung busting). So, I am always excited when I can get out and see the action. But, who is the first person that I see when I walk through those Pearly Cyclocross Gates? Well, none other than my good friend Dylan from Yakima. The same Dylan who has put together this little School of Cross.

He always talks about his Bike Vigilante friends. I'm thinking that this must be them. But, who knows really? I have certainly been wrong before.

As I was putting up these past few photos I actually received an email from Dylan inviting me over for dinner tomorrow night with his lovely girlfriend Erin (which is not one of those three girls in the top photo.) Am I still invited?

In any case, I had some cross racing to watch.

Molly was there. Killing it. Adam was there. Also Killing it, but maybe saving a little for the next night. Chris Jones came in second (what? it was dry) to Jamey Driscoll (what? he's from VT) and J. Page was in the mix as well.

I'm calling it right now. This is going to be both Molly Cameron and Jonathan Page's years, respectively. I'm just putting it out there. And I am really hoping that the MC decides to head back to Euro-land. I didn't get enough of P. Tachalet at Interbike...and he told me the good news. He finally got heat in his house, so this time when I come to stay I will not have to freeze my ass off all night.

122: In Session.

Its kind of unclear how this really came about. I've been thinking back through how it all broke down. I think it went something like this.


Joe said he knew this guy at work who used to be a pro motocross racer (Thor). That's his bike above. Apparently those things go real fast off road. Not only that but someone was telling me recently (and this could be a fabrication of my mind, I'm not sure) that motocross racers (motocrossers?) are some of the fittest athletes around.

In any case I suggested we should try and moto-pace behind him on the dirt, with cross bikes. So, the Ira Ryan and Mr. Igleheart and a Raleigh SS shaped like a beer can made the trip out to some unknown location to give it a try.


Then Dylan said we should film it, and magically Dave showed up. I'm not going to lie, it did take a little bit of convincing on all parts. "But Guys, it will be AWESOME." I know that we must eschew your wife and his girlfriend for the evening, but I promise, its gonna be good." The light? Don't even worry about it, we've got light for days.


As Dan Action once said "I love when a plan comes together." We only had a few short minutes of light, so we just threw the bikes out of the van and went for it. But first we made sure that Dave was safely strapped to Thor's back. People, just so you know, these guys are professionals (not the Dusty Chimps in the lycra) the shooter and the driver. Do not try this at home (or if you do, at least document it).


Everything went off according to plan though. No one got hurt. At least not visibly. I realized that maybe, if you're riding 20 some odd miles per hour behind a dirtbike through a busted, rutted field that maybe you should back it off just a notch. Nah, I'm joking, turn that fucker up to eleven. Or in this case go full throttle.

Myles (GO SEE THIS SHOW) was just here and he said that he was worried that the film would turn people off to the School of Cross? Crazy Talk I say, we just needed to work out the kinks so that when we step into that arena (teaching that is) we would be ready to drop some knowledge. Trust me though when I say that we will drop that knowledge gently. Seriously. Can't wait to see everyone on Monday.

Now lets go race some cross shall we?

112: Little (pink) Vices.

So, here's how it goes. The train of thought. Dylan and I are putting together what we've come to call the School of Cross. Which will be three Monday nights starting at the end of September. We're going big on this one people, so get involved.

I'll get back to that later, but the point is...Dylan puts up the flier and starts getting calls about it. Can we do this? Can we do that? And one guy even called up to see if we're going to be having a Uni-cycle division. Duh. Of course we're going to have a unicycle division... it is going to be out at Forrest Park.

Here's the trailer for it:


Moving On.

I returned to the office the other day to find this sitting on my desk.

Apparently it had been left by Tina Brubaker, but no one had any idea why? So, I thought, what the hey, I'm a big fan of Vice, and a part time detective. I should be able to figure out why this was left for me. First I held it by the spine and shook it. Nothing happened, no secret note fell out, so I went looking for clues in the articles.

I wondered, out loud, if maybe there was an article or something that Tina thought I would be interested in. Maybe something about oils for legs, or (lets go big here) an article about bikes? Something, anything?

First I went and looked through the DO's and DON'Ts.

Apparently they're being written by Johnny Ryan (he's done comix for Hustler, Screw and of course Nickelodean Kids Magazine [which kind of makes sense]) and they're all really funny. So, I thought to myself: Self, maybe Tina has seen you around town and knows your inner concern for not having enough style and she's trying to tell you something here. No go.

Then I came across this article:

Its a very informative article about a dildo factory in Germany. I showed it to Dylan when he was here and he said "wow, that's some really great photography" and he was right. They employ something like 20 people at this little pleasure factory. But I still couldn't get my head around it, this couldn't be the reason she sent it right? I mean, this stuff is interesting sure, but its still Vice after all.

And then I found this:

Kind of a fitting titled I'd say.

This had to be it right? I've referenced Herzog here than a few times. And now someone has brought me a publication to show me there is a new book about Werner Herzog coming out? Amazing. And not only that but the book is the Production Diary from Fitzcarraldo, Herzog's film where he quite literally drags a steamship through the mountainous jungles of Peru. Plus, his book Of Walking in Ice has been my favorite book of the year. So, if this is in the same journalistic style. Then I'm willing to give it a try.

Sorry, I just got all sentimental and weepy there for a minute. Lets get down to business. At this point had I discovered why this magazine would appear out of nowhere?

No. But the answer was soon to come...